Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The Abyss

Dear Readers of Becca's Blog,

While revising, Becca slipped and fell into The Deep Dark Writerly Abyss. Hence her recent absence.

Be warned: the edges of the Abyss, so often necessary to traverse while traveling through Revision Land, are very slippery. This is due to an abundant growth of misplaced commas and overused emdashes.

Conditions inside the Abyss are fittingly abysmal. Survivors report secretions of noxious fumes, said to lead to Writer's Block, insanity, and impulsive use of the delete key. Some claim to have seen horrific carvings in the walls -- the words from their manuscript's revisions!

The Abyss walls are sheer and in some vast chasms impossible to find. Hope of climbing out is minimal. Experts advise that fallen Revisers re-read warm fuzzy comments left on snippets, eat large quantities of chocolate, and write only when suitable amounts of sleep deprivation have knocked out their Inner Editors. Such measures increase one's ability to resist the effects of noxious fumes, and as such increase one's chances of finding a path out of the Abyss.

The following message was delivered earlier today from the depths of the Abyss via carrion bird.

Dear Blogosphere,

Am still alive. Hope to be back soon. Would very much appreciate if someone tossed down essentials. (ie. mousse cake, marshmallows, ice cream, toilet paper.)



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