Today, I went to a government building to get my name changed on a piece of ID. There was nobody in it. There were merely two phones sitting on two little tables in front of two lists of phone numbers.
After checking the sign on the door a few dozen times to make sure I was in the right place, I sat down and started calling those phone numbers. They put me on hold. For a long time.
Then sketchy janitorial staff started walking by in the hall, looking at me like those cannibals in that movie looked at that tasty castaway.